Early B – Wheely Wheely

1985, Sunset / Wheely Wheely Connection

Monster album being Bim Kill Him’d right now, all readers pay attention! Early B is one of the rare deejays who is STRICTLY culture, not even dipping a little toe into slackness, and you will not hear any ‘connection’ or ‘keeping a dance’ or ‘boops’ or any pirated style. Everything out of his mouth could only come out of his mouth. Example one: in Stop The Robbery, Early B tells the story of being beaten and robbed and deciding to join with the army to fight on the right of justice, but the barracks captain turns him back because he is too weak and spindly.

Him said a youth like me should be at me home
Cah me nah no jawbone fe go blow saxophone

This was one of the first reggae records I heard and I remember my young mind being blown by the humility and self-deprecating comedy on show. This and many other tunes in this record (of just eight tunes!) showcase how, with some talent and skill, you can write excellent lyrics about just about anything. See example two: Wheely Wheely, Early B’s biggest hit by far, and the tune responsible for the album cover, my favourite cover of all time. Scroll up and look at it again. How much can you tell about this album, and this person, by looking at the cover? A victorious celebration of joy and whimsy. Anyway I was going to make a point about the lyrics. It is about wheelies on bicycles. Nobody in the pop/R&B/trap sphere is going to write a tune about wheelies. And yet the lyrics are top shelf:

I like how the youth them a ride one wheel
Well outta Three Mile a dozen ride and rope in
Say cycle exhibition, them a work up a steam
Say Horse make a wheely and a girl start scream
A man take off him glass, and wipe it off clean
Say them a youth man a must e riding machine
Them block the roundabout, no bus can go a Papine
Well here come the officers, them looking well mean
Them drive inna them car and a blow the siren
To make a escape we have fe ride like a team
So round the roundabout with one wheel inna the air
Say bus conductor, me say bank cashier
The whole o’ them come and them a stand up and a stare
So me hold upon me cycle, me change me gear, bo
Touch up the angle and me flash it everywhere

If you are a songwriter please take note. I feel like outside of certain musical spaces (one of which being, of course, 80s dancehall), people get so caught up in writing lyrics that follow a certain set of unwritten conventions very strictly. Oh, the lyrics must be cool. Oh, the lyrics must be introspective. Oh, the lyrics must be poetic. Oh, there must be clever double entendres and rhyming schemes. Observe how people in the hip hop sphere obsess over this (MF Doom fans). Observe how people inn the classic rock sphere obsess over that. And look at Early B. People talk about guilty pleasures, but this is a pure pleasure. Purely pure. People talk about style and fashion and cool. Where does Wheely Wheely lie in the realm of coolness? It feels like the concept is not even applicable. But everyone loves it. Not least of all myself. I don’t really have anything else to say about it besides more glaze. This record is one CRUCIAL among CRUCIALs (in the Bim Kill Him scoring scheme). 29 minutes of no gimmicks, just lyrics and Radics.

Bim count: 0
My picks: Wheely Wheely, Owner Man, Stop The Robbery, Bicycle Bicycle